I almost officially have a teenager on my hands. Who knew there would be such a big difference between being a teenager and raising one. I remember the hard time that I gave my mom but was I really this miserable to deal with? I remember middle school but I do not remember dealing with so many mean girl issues. I guess this is just another sign that I am getting old and turning into my mother. That isn’t a bad thing but I really can’t handle anymore drama.
Every day is is another issue… someone wouldn’t talk to me. Someone was gossiping about me. Someone wouldn’t sit with me at lunch. I also get the question of “Mom, what’s wrong with me?” It is a constant struggle to help my teen understand that she is not the problem. I am really confused about how parents can’t see problems with their kids. I get that I only have one child to worry about but still I don’t understand. Kids are good at hiding things, I understand, but I have learned to look for the same signs that I exhibit when I am having a rough time.
I can spot a change in my child as soon as she walks in the door. Sure, I ask the requisite questions like how was your day and do you have homework, but these questions and the way they are answered are signs as to how the day really was. I struggle daily with my own stressors, between balancing work, school and her activities but I try really hard to not let them affect her.
That sigh when she sits down at her desk tells me it was a long day. The screaming because I am bothering her to eat a snack tells me it was a bad day. The crying tells me that she isn’t happy.
In no way am I the perfect mom. We do fast food when I am tired. We do slamming doors and screaming matches. But we also do dance parties and crafts. We watch movies and have popcorn. I realize it isn’t my job to fix everything but it is my job to help her through this tangled mess called life.
I am off to conquer today’s bad day struggles. For other mom’s who are facing similar struggles, know you aren’t alone. I just take things one day at a time and make note of the good days to remind her of them.